“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.” ~Helen Keller
What do you think of when you hear the word Adventure?
Daring…risky…exciting…maybe even a bit scary?
Adventures often have an element of the unknown, risk, and perhaps danger. I’ve noticed that there are different levels of adventure that appeal to each of us. What thrills me may seem tame to someone else. What thrills someone else may seem impossible for me to do.
Whether you’re quick to jump on board or prefer to think things through before taking a well-calculated risk, I believe it’s important for each of us to cultivate our own unique spirit of adventure. That spirit calls for us to try new things that take us out of our comfort zones, to stretch, grow, and reach for new accomplishments. The spirit of adventure is when we “participate in exciting undertakings or enterprises,” according to Dictionary.com.
My adult son, Ben, recently went skydiving with his girlfriend Kate. They were nervously excited about this great adventure and thoroughly researched the company they chose to literally, take the jump. Even though I was nervous, too, I saluted their courage in overcoming fear and doing such a daring act. I was the first person Ben called when his feet were safely on the ground once more and his voice was full of excitement and joy as he told me that it was one of the most amazing experiences of his life. His adrenaline and thrill were evident and contagious. I felt both relief and happiness for Ben and Kate; especially knowing that they took this adventurous step together.
I have no burning desire to jump out of a perfectly good airplane; however, I have my own sense of adventure. It often comes alive for me when I travel. I recently went to Texas for a work trip and extended my stay for a few days of fun and adventure exploring Texas Hill Country with my co-worker and friend, Kelye.
Kelye travels to Texas frequently for work and she designated herself my official tour guide for our long weekend together. She drove us through big cities and small towns: Austin, Fredericksburg, Comfort, and San Antonio. We drove through Luckenbach, Texas (where Waylon, Willie, and the gang sang). I tried new foods and drinks, saw new animals (such as armadillos), stayed on a ranch, and even bought myself a pair of red cowgirl boots as a reminder of this fun road trip. Traveling always taps into my sense of adventure as I find myself more open to see, taste, smell, listen, touch – and thoroughly experience new places, people, and things.
What taps into your sense of adventure?
What activities bring you the thrill of excitement?
What will you do this summer to explore and stretch out of your comfort zone?
If you’re looking for good ideas, I have a great suggestion!
I warmly invite you to our first Wholistic Woman Scavenger Hunt. This local adventure will take you around the historic district of Frederick, MD, and help you discover and experience it in new, creative ways.
Frequently, we take our hometown or nearby attractions for granted; we may not make time to enjoy and explore them. This is your chance to get to know Frederick better as you hunt for items and activities in the four Wholistic categories of body, heart, mind, and spirit.
Clues in each category will challenge you and your teammates to find and photograph such things as:
Heart: Do an act of kindness for an elderly person such as helping them across the street or paying for their parking meter.
Mind: Go to the house of the famous woman who said “Shoot if you must, this old gray head, but spare your country’s flag!” and salute the flag displayed there.
Body: Get a postural assessment from our sponsor, Spring Ridge Chiropractic, at the tallest, straightest place in Baker Park.
Spirit: Photograph your team at one of the many houses of worship in Frederick and light a candle, say a prayer, or meditate together.
These, and many more clues, will stretch your minds as you walk around town; be sure to wear comfortable shoes! Find and do as many of these clues as you can (or want to) in an hour and a half. Wholistic Woman Retreats will provide snacks and plenty of water to keep you hydrated and happy as you explore old town Frederick.
Create your own team, or come on your own and join a team at the event. This is a great team-building experience, whether you’re bringing co-workers, staff, or board members…or if you meet your team that day. You’ll get to know others as you explore the streets of Frederick – on the move – learning, connecting, and growing.
At the conclusion of the Scavenger Hunt we will gather upstairs at Brewer’s Alley to celebrate with cold drinks, dinner, and a recap of team adventures with a slideshow of your scavenger hunt photos. Fun prizes will be awarded, but we know the best reward will be the sense of accomplishment and connection you will feel from getting outside your comfort zone with other Women-on-the-Grow.
To participate in the Wholistic Scavenger Hunt, register yourself and/or your team. Plan to arrive at the Baker Park Gazebo at 4:30 on July 26th. The hunt will run from 5:00-6:30 PM, followed by dinner and celebration at Brewer’s Alley till 8:00 PM.
I hope to see you there…let’s have an adventure together!
Today’s Author: Carol deLaski, PCC, is an executive coach, founder of Wholistic Woman Retreats, and author of Lost and Found: Discovering Strength in Love and Faith. Learn more about her coaching and training services at www.caroldelaski.com or email her at: [email protected].
This Tuesday was a Tuesday like any other: I got ready for the day, placed my Starbucks coffee order, headed to my BNI meeting and set up the coffee for my group, and began networking. The morning meetings went well and I felt energized and hyped to continue going about my day. After the BNI leadership team meeting, I drove from Frederick over to Mount Airy for another meeting with a new contact.
Again, the meeting went very well. We were even able to sit outside and chat in the cool breeze at a shaded table. It was very pleasant, and I climbed back into my car afterward feeling great about myself and my business.
I decided, since I was in Mount Airy, to stop by the local Jimmie Cone. If you have never heard of Jimmie Cone before, it’s a local ice cream stop with locations in Mount Airy and Damascus, and they’re known for the crunchy “jimmie” sprinkles that go on top of the ice cream. I have many fond childhood memories from when I used to live in Mount Airy of going to Jimmie Cone with my dad and enjoying a cone in the summer evenings. Well, since I had driven up here and had some time, I drove the two minutes over to the Mount Airy location.
I got my ice cream, took the first bite, relaxed into my seat, and took a look around me. Fluffy white clouds floated across a bright blue sky, and despite the busy road being nearby, it was actually pretty quiet in the middle of the day. A breeze tossed my hair away from my face and kept the sunshine from being too oppressive. I put away my phone and took the time to enjoy the beautiful day and my delicious ice cream with the crunchy jimmies (which I rarely allow myself these days). While I had originally only planned on stopping for maybe ten minutes and wolfing down my frozen treat, I ended up stealing half an hour. It was worth every second.
As a relatively new business owner, I struggle with finding the right balance for my days. I’m going into my second year of full-time business, so I’m still working out some of the remaining kinks and striking the right work-play-rest ratio. On advice from multiple seasoned business owners in my circle, I’ve recently begun working hard on my time management and scheduling out my days to make my workload easier to deal with and also to ensure I’m still getting enough time for sleep, exercise, and time with friends and family.
I had attended the Be Balanced event at the end of May with Carol deLaski, and one of the takeaways for me from that event was the reminder to find balance, and if I can’t find it (i.e., if it doesn’t happen naturally), then I need to create it until I do “find” it. And my unexpected Jimmie Cone time was a reminder to build in time for rest and play—or at least, not to feel guilty when those moments pop up.
When I finished my ice cream, I smiled, cleaned up my trash, turned on my car, and drove off to return to my business.
Today’s blog is written by one of our alliance partners, Kira Tregoning. Kira is the owner and founder of Maia Media Management, a local social media management and editing business. She offers social media management, consultations, and trainings, as well as video services, proofreading, editing, and manuscript critiques. Kira is also a published author with two fantasy novels available on Amazon and more on the way. Learn more about her at kiratregoning.com.
While we do address tough and emotional issues during coaching, Wholistic Woman also has a fun side! If you haven’t seen our Missy & Flo video series, you should watch it now! A series of 8 videos, our coaches share self-care tips in a fun and engaging way. Here’s the second video in the series:
On May 3, 2017, I turned 50! When I was a little girl, this number seemed big and very far away. Now that I’m here, this number feels normal. It’s where I am supposed to be. It is part of the truth of who I am and is a testament to how far I’ve come. I’ve learned a lot in my first 50 years! I am happy with myself and the growth I’ve experienced.
As I reflected back on how far I have come and what I have learned along the way, I thought it might be fun to come up with 50 things I’ve learned over 50 years. What you will find below is the list. 🙂
My 50 things are listed in no particular order. They represent many teachers from which I have learned from through the years. Some of my teachers have been authors, some have been spiritual leaders, some have been friends. I have also learned from the “mistakes” I’ve made…I put mistakes in quotations because I believe if I learn something then it is not really a mistake but rather a lesson.
My initial thought was to just share this list with my two girls who are also living through significant milestones. My daughter Kayla has just graduated from nursing school and is entering the world of “adulting” for the first time. She is both excited and scared. My daughter Helena has just completed her Associates degree and will be heading away to college in the fall. She too is both excited and scared. This list was first conceived as a gift to them. It was meant to be a place they could go to when they were feeling lost or scared. You see, I remember what it was like to be at the places they are now and yes, at times it felt scary! My hope is this list will be something they use to remind them of where and who they come from. My hope is that they will take this list and make it their own. That they will question me about what I mean for the entries they don’t understand…that they will reject the ones that don’t work for them…that they will add to the list with things they have learned…that they will share with me their thoughts about the list. My hope is that they will see this list as a gift.
The more I thought about it though, the more I wanted to share this with you, too. You being the supporters of the Wholistic Woman Community. You have been such a gift to me. You have helped shape me into the woman I am today. So, this list is also my gift to you. I hope you enjoy it. I also invite you to do all the things I have invited my girls to do. Please share with me which parts of the list you relate to, as well as which parts you don’t. And, if you are really up to a challenge, write your own list! I’d love to see it!
50 Things I’ve Learned Over 50 Years
It’s OK to not know…Be brave enough to ask.
Kindness rules! Practice it with yourself and others.
You are a leader.
The book The Four Agreements is a must read.
Take regular trips outside your comfort zone.
Your first thoughts will always come automatically but your next thought is one you have control over. Choosing the best second thought changes EVERYTHING!
Make generous assumptions.
Emotions are your teacher.
Emotions are meant to be felt, not buried.
Find a spiritual practice and practice it.
Arguing with reality won’t change things but will be extremely frustrating.
Don’t put anything in writing that you wouldn’t feel comfortable having publicly announced.
Know when a conversation would be better than a text – tone and the energy behind your words can often be misinterpreted in the written word.
Seek first to understand.
Practice choosing courage over comfort.
Pain is inevitable but suffering is not.
Trust your gut.
Don’t forget how to play and have fun!
Not everybody sees the world the same way you do.
When somebody shows you who they are, believe them.
Worrying is a waste of time and creative energy.
What is meant for you will always find away.
Make sleep and rest a priority.
Nurture the relationships that are important to you.
Fear is normal and learning how to move forward in the face of it is imperative.
There are only three kinds of business: your business, their business, and God’s business. Anytime you are not in your business you are in the wrong place.
Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
Too much is too much.
The most important time ever is now.
You’ll never hit a target you don’t aim for.
Soul food is real….Watch what you feed your spirit.
Nurture your creativity.
Practice letting go of things you have no control over.
Journal! Getting your thoughts and feeling out and on paper is very good for you.
Dogs and three-year-olds are great teachers.
No one is a mind reader.
You were born worthy and enough.
We are all perfectly imperfect.
FORGIVE.
Happiness is an inside job.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
The Little Soul and the Sun is an amazing book, please read it at least once a year.
We are meant to change and grow.
You can’t out train a poor diet.
There is never only one right way.
Byron Katie and Brené Brown are wise women – reading their books has changed the way I see the world.
You eat an elephant one bite at a time.
The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago; the next best time is now.
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail.
Never let your age stop you.
Today’s author: Laura Hall, CPC, CDWF: As a certified professional coach since 2009, Laura Hall, Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator has been helping people just like you make changes in. As a mother of 2 girls, Laura has a special interest in coaching parents, so if you still have children living at home, ask Laura about her Wholehearted Parenting programs. Laura can be reached via email at [email protected] or feel free to visit her website HallCoaching.com
I’ve been thinking lately about the word energized and what that means to me. It was my One Word in 2015 and one of its definitions that really resonates with me is “to cause a transformation”.
I’m usually looking for a personal transformation of some sort on a daily basis. You might say, “Really, daily?!” Yes, honestly, I do look for at least a mini transformation every day. What exactly do I mean by that? Well, it usually has to do with my desire to drastically change the way that I am thinking about something in the moment. For example, there are days that I wake up and one of my first thoughts is, “Ugh, today is the day that I need to (fill in the activity/task) and that makes me feel (fill in the negative emotion).” I have to admit, it’s not a good way to start the day. But it does seem to be human nature to allow the negative thoughts in our heads to surface as we think about what’s ahead of us each day. I’ve come to realize that it’s what I do after this thought pops up that really makes the difference for me.
Walking through your day with negative, demotivating thoughts is not productive or pleasant at all. So I have learned to do a few things to immediately change my day’s trajectory, to transform or energize it. As soon as I catch myself having that first negative thought, I do a couple of quick things to turn this around. I often start with a morning meditation and say several things out loud that I am grateful for. It may be really simple things like: It’s Friday, I woke up on time, or I have something good in the refrigerator for breakfast. Then I think about what I intend for my day. If I have something to do that seems somewhat daunting or unpleasant, I visualize that going well or better than expected. Finally, I create some positive affirmations that can help fuel that vision for the day.
Let me give you a specific example of how this works for me.
I may wake up and think, “Oh no, I have to drive down to Virginia this morning for an early meeting and the traffic is going to be terrible because it’s raining. That feels really stressful.” That isn’t a very motivating thought to wake up to. It makes me feel like staying in bed and pulling the covers over my head.
To get energized and drastically change that thought process, I immediately think of several things I am grateful for about this situation; for example, it’s rain rather than snow, I woke up a little earlier than planned, and I am meeting with a very nice group of people who are excited that I am joining them today.
Then I try to quiet my mind to visualize getting to the meeting easily and having a very positive outcome. Positive affirmations are the key component to keeping that vision energized. In this example, I might say:
Everything I need today is coming to me easily and effortlessly.
I am now being given the perfect solution for this situation.
I am energized and enthusiastic about the day ahead.
Those of you who know me well know that I am a big believer in a practice of visualization and positive affirmations. There’s a great deal of scientific research that has been done in the field of neuroscience that shows a direct correlation between our thoughts and words and the outcomes we experience in our lives.
Neuroscientists have shown that our brains focus on what we think most about. If we are constantly thinking and worrying about how we might be stressed or unsuccessful during the day, then our brains get geared up for that inevitability.
Conversely, if we tell our brain that today is going to be a good day and positive experiences are coming our way, then the brain starts scouting out opportunities to make that happen. What does that mean? We can change the way our day evolves with the thoughts that we feed our brains.
Imagine for a moment that you allowed yourself to eat only candy bars, potato chips, and ice cream all day long every day for a year, and ate nothing else. That doesn’t sound all together bad when you first think of it, right? But you realize that your body wouldn’t function well physically if the only thing you fed it was junk food. In fact, you might get very sick if you made that your diet for a long period of time.
Now consider what you may be feeding your mind all day long. Whether we do it intentionally or unconsciously, we all allow our minds to be filled with some negative self chatter. When we allow ourselves to listen to this negative chatter in our head, I think it’s fair to say that this is junk food for our minds. And that can’t have a healthy impact on us either.
What is the negative chatter? Well, it’s that demotivating internal self talk that tells you that you will never realize your vision for your life, or even for this day, because you just aren’t enough – you aren’t young enough, smart enough, deserving enough. Whatever it tells you, that unkind chatter in your head holds you back from realizing the life you desire to live. It limits you, drags you down, and starts to convince you that others could pull that off (whatever THAT is) but YOU can’t. And a steady daily diet of these negative thoughts can weigh you down and make you feel mentally exhausted.
Hmm, that sounds like the complete opposite of being energized, right?
Of course, there are a lot of things we can do for ourselves to feel more energized – get proper rest, eat healthy foods, exercise, laugh, be social, pray. However, one of the most impactful ways for me to get energized is to pay attention to the messages I am sending myself throughout the day. When I use positive affirmations to infuse my personal visualization for a great day, it’s amazing how much more energized I feel.
Would you like to explore what the personal thoughts are that are draining your energy and then transform them into inspiring thoughts that empower and energize your intentions?
If so, join us for the Be EnergizedEvening Retreat on June 28th. I will be facilitating the discussion and will help you create energizing, customized, positive affirmations that will infuse your vision for your life. This is a simple process and when applied regularly can make some immediate positive changes. I look forward to sharing more with you. Hope to see you on the 28th!
Click here for event information and to register. Reserve your spot today!
Today’s blog was written by WWR Partner Coach, Donna Kettell. Donna is a certified professional coach (CPC) and a master practitioner in energy leadership (ELI-MP). Her certifications were earned through The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC), which is accredited by the International Coaching Federation (ICF).
While we do address tough and emotional issues during coaching, Wholistic Woman also has a lighter, fun side! If you haven’t seen our Missy & Flo video series, you should watch it now! A series of 8 videos, our coaches share self-care tips in a fun and engaging way. Here’s the first video in the series:
Have you ever noticed how challenging it can be to speak up and say the hard thing?
I’ve learned a lot about that recently in surprising ways. I’ve been part of the Wholistic Woman Retreat (WWR) community since the beginning and recently became an Alliance Partner in January.
Over the years, I have learned about Energy Leadership, Strengths Finders, self-care and have attended multiple WWR overnight retreats studying Brené Brown’s work. Suffice it to say that I have a recipe box chock-full of ingredients to make a great life!
Like many women in mid-life, I’ve been dealing with a lot of change. Last year, while mourning the loss of my father, I turned 50, changed jobs twice in a line of work that I had never liked, started transforming my jewelry-making hobby into a legitimate business…all while taking care of an aging pet who has separation anxiety. Talk about a recipe for emotional meltdown!
When I left my last career, I took a few months to just chill and see what I was going to do with the rest of my life. During that time, I reached out to a friend who had coached me in the past and asked about getting more involved with Wholistic Woman Retreats. I had time on my hands and I needed to feel part of something bigger and better than myself. It worked out, in a very surreal way, that my skill set was just what WWR needed at that time. I was so happy to be accepted and become a partner to this thriving organization whose mission is to help women be their best.
The timing of my becoming a WWR Alliance Partner was a little wonky because it was mid-late January and the team was in full planning mode for the annual overnight retreat in March. No matter, I was willing and able to dive in and do whatever I needed to do to help make this retreat a great success.
Oh, one thing I forgot to mention is that I am a recovering perfectionist with trust issues. I don’t like to disappoint and hate to make mistakes because my experience with former work, family and friends was…let’s just say, not pleasant.
Time flew by and the week of the retreat came up in what felt like five minutes. My over-achiever kicked in and with my new responsibilities, I started to feel anxious that I wasn’t performing up to what I thought was expected of me. I was still trying to figure out my place in the group, learn and create new processes and procedures, and understand how to communicate with the other members. I wanted to serve in the best, and most genuine, way but I felt a little lost.
I showed up at the retreat site ready to work and to make everyone happy. I jumped in and helped whomever needed me and did whatever needed to be done. My perfectionist side showed up with me and as I went along, there were little things that I judged myself as not doing right. I also thought that others judged me as not being enough. With that thinking I quickly began a downward spiral – feeling defeated and inadequate.
When I got home from the retreat, I was physically and emotionally spent. I sat and thought about everything and re-read the programs to ponder what had happened. I seriously contemplated the feelings that I had and how I was going to act upon them. I waited until we had a follow-up call with the retreat team to hear their perceptions. Once I learned what the coaches were feeling and how they had to shift between roles at the retreat, I began to understand how that led me to feel lost and left to fend for myself. Despite that insight, I still felt guilty that I didn’t figure it out on my own and that I had somehow let the team down. Have I ever told you that I’d like to add mind-reader to my list of super powers?
Fortunately, I decided to immerse myself in the strategies that were taught during the retreat. I experienced valuable interactions, and identified action steps, during the retreat that I knew would be key in processing the challenges that I now faced. I wanted to address my feelings and frustrations in an appropriate, graceful, and authentic way. I also knew that to open myself up in this way would be very uncomfortable. I was scared and really just wanted to quit and walk away. That’s how I typically would have reacted in the past when faced with hard conversations. For me, walking away is a defense mechanism to avoid my emotional pain.
But this time I didn’t walk away. I voiced my concerns to Carol, the Founder/CEO of WWR, and was ready for what I thought would be a very negative and sad outcome. I was used to having a sweet and easy relationship with Carol and I thought it would surely end here. I had made mistakes, showed that I wasn’t perfect, and assumed that I was probably a huge disappointment to them all.
Instead, I was given even more grace than I expected, showered with love and concern, and was shaken to my core in a really good way. It was one of the healthiest, positive, and constructive conversations I have ever had with anyone. It was probably one of the few times in my life that I was able to be authentic, yet not feel bad or worried during and after the conversation. I felt that I was honored for who I was and what I wanted to accomplish.
It was a wonderful outcome to a hard conversation…and it doesn’t end there.
After experiencing such a positive result from that hard conversation I felt pretty good about myself (thank you very much) and decided I had one more in me that had been hanging around for over 30 years……
I explained to Andrew, the love of my life, that I wanted to get married.
He said yes.
So we were married on May 5th.
End of this story but the beginning of many more…
Today’s Author: Terry Drankiewicz is a long time member and new alliance partner of WWR. As she considers what her next career will be, Terry recently started a new business, RAW Designs LLC, designing and creating jewelry and small art pieces from repurposed and unique items. She lives in Keedysville with her husband Andrew, and her dog, Boo Boo Kitty. You can see her jewelry and art creations on Facebook at @rawdesignsllc and can reach her at 301-730-1186 or [email protected].
I am turning fifty in May. What’s the big deal? So are dozens of my close friends, thank god. Well, it is a big deal for us. We ponder what this next decade and life are going to look like for us.
My spring tour includes the following 10 destinations for sure:
Daytona, Boston, Newport RI, Sedona, Santé Fe, Chicago, Houston, Texas Hill Country, Jamaica, and San Diego
What are your favorite places to travel?
Most of you that are close to me know I travel for business and my business is in airports, namely Dallas Fort Worth Airport. But the cities on my Frolicking Fifty list have very little to do with business travel. In fact, only two cities have business conferences that will turn into days of frolicking.
Joanne, Lileigh, Sabrina, Steve, David and Kelye in Daytona Beach
In April, I visited Daytona Beach, Florida to celebrate one of my oldest best friends turning 50, Joanne. We go back to the 4th grade, so we have known each other for 40 years! Growing up, her family invited me on many trips, like Daytona (where we just were), and Arizona where I fell in love with Sedona. When I reflect on those four decades together, we were in and out of each other’s lives because we only went to elementary school together for two years. We were in different middle schools, high schools, and colleges. But we were each other’s maid of honor and I am the godparent of her daughter, Lileigh. We also consider her youngest daughter, Sabrina, as my godchild. Joanne and I think that in some cosmic way, she is a part of me, not just in looks but personality too. Our life is such an amazing love story.
What’s your favorite old friend love story?
Godchild Stephanie
In early May, I head to Boston and Newport, RI with my niece/godchild, Brittany, my sister-in-law, Robin and oldest friend Susie. I love that my niece wants to spend time with her aunt/godmother. We are going to an Orioles/Red Sox game at Fenway ballpark. We will surely be “hitting” some fun pubs and making more travel memories together. After Boston with family, Susie (kindergarten and up) is picking me up and we are heading to Newport to celebrate both of our fiftieth birthdays. When we were growing up, Susie and her family adopted me as well on family trips, mostly camping. My husband Steve and I are the godparents to Susie’s daughter, Stephanie.
In the middle of May will be plenty of local celebrating with family and friends nearby. Carol, founder of Wholistic Woman Retreats, is putting together a fun patio party downtown Frederick – celebrating is a key component of our community and we do it so well!
At the end of May, I head to Sedona and Santé Fe, where I will be turning and celebrating my 50th birthday with my husband, Joanne, and family. Steve is taking me to my favorite destination, Sedona, for a few days where I always get and feel centered. It’s the vortexes, I am telling you, and maybe a spa treatment! Then we drive to Santé Fe for Lileigh’s graduation and may head to Colorado for Memorial Day weekend. Sabrina and I will celebrate our birthdays together, as she is turning 16 the day after me, my mini-me cosmic daughter. Who knows, some frolicking might even include a hot air balloon ride. We are still mapping out our adventure for the big milestone weekend.
Debbie Hill frolicking in Texas Hill Country
What are your favorite adventures?
The frolicking tour continues as we head to Chicago in early June. This time it’s a U2 concert, on my bucket list for sure by age fifty, and I will be FIFTY! Joanne bought me tickets for my birthday, so we are meeting up for more play time. Later in June and July, I head to Houston for an airport conference and then off to Texas Hill Country. Red wine will certainly be involved. Texas Hill Country wine region is making a pretty big statement. Of course, everything in Texas is big! It’s not just the wine, it’s the rolling hills – combine that with Debbie Hill and you are packed with fun.
What’s on your life bucket list?
The finale of my frolicking days for the sake of my fiftieth celebration will be in Jamaica and San Diego with my best college girlfriends and more time with my best girl Jenny! All my college roommates, including Natalie, Christy and Erin and close sorority sisters like Barb and Jenn will be in Jamaica. It doesn’t get better than that, yeah man! California dreaming will be the last stop with a hospitality conference in San Diego and off to finish with best friends Jenn and Todd in Orange County California, where they live. We are entertaining enough for each other, so anything else that happens will just be extra in our world. We are such a compatible travel team, as we have been to Jamaica, Mexico, Italy, Austria, and Germany, to name a few places. It just makes sense to wrap up this fiftieth celebration with our peas in a pod.
Who are your peas in a pod?
Celebrating with my godchildren, oldest friends, college friends, family, and husband is such a blessing – I truly value growing from my roots. I have heard the fifties are the best and I already see that frolicking into my fifties will be the BEST of friends, family, beaches, ballgames, milestone celebrations, red rocks, red wine, rolling hills, spas, concerts, and best of all, travel – my take away in life is TRAVEL OFTEN! We are always traveling and on a path – fifty feels a little like a fork in the road. What I know is, traveling is better when frolicking with family and friends, no matter what age you are. I thank everyone that makes this a happy, lifelong adventure, including my mom, who I know is always with me for the ride.
What do you look forward to celebrating in your life?
Today’s author: Kelye Rouse-Brown, CHA, CHT is a business owner, joint venture partner, HR expert, certified coach, and training professional. Her 3 components: Educate, Motivate, and Cultivate help her clients develop, spark action, and grow a successful career/business and life from the core. Kelye can be reached at 301-371-9300 or by visiting her website: krbtrainingsolutions.com
What does it feel like when your life is in balance?
Does it energize you, leave you feeling relaxed, or is there some other quality that best describes it for you?
More importantly, how do you know when you’ve achieved that elusive equilibrium that we refer to as balance?
I’ve noticed that balance often looks, and feels, different for each of us. What’s great for me may be overwhelming for another. What’s optimal for you may be boring to someone else. What makes us feel balanced is unique to each of us. Only you know what components are necessary for your well-being.
Some of the needed ingredients could be time outdoors, quality time with loved ones, solitude, or time for spiritual renewal. Others may need time with a support group, exercise, good nutrition, music, creative expression…this list could go on and on. Knowing what makes up your personal access code for balance will enable you to achieve it more often.
Our bodies can provide abundant information about how we’re doing by sending us warning signals when we’re out of balance, as well as calming reassurance when we are in a healthy zone.
Many of us experience negative physical symptoms when we are on overload: backaches, headaches, digestive troubles, and sleeplessness are examples of red flags that warn us when we are not taking good care of ourselves. These indicators of stress are signals to slow down, rest, practice self-care, and restore well-being to our lives.
Our bodies also send signals when we are in a positive state of balance. When I’m experiencing a high sense of well-being I notice that I often smile to myself as I go about my daily activities. I appreciate my surroundings and the people I encounter more. I release the striving that often appears when I’m out of balance and gratefully receive what each day brings.
When we begin to pay more attention to our well-being we notice what it feels like to be in, or out, of balance. We learn our own personal warning signals that can indicate when we are getting off track. This is helpful on a daily and weekly basis, but also on a larger scale as well.
As I look back on the past year, I can see that I have had a series of activities that have thrown my balance off kilter. The love of my life moved in with me one year ago and we became engaged on Christmas Eve. That would have been a big adjustment in and of itself, but layered on top of that were a number of family support roles that I chose to take on.
I overextended myself and my physical, emotional, and mental health was impacted by doing too much. An upswing in my business coincided with these changes and even though almost everything was good, I still found myself stressed to do it all…and be it all. Eventually, something had to give, and my warning signals of exhaustion, sickness, irritability, and depression got my attention.
I started pulling back, taking much needed downtime, and making conscious choices that would refill my own tank. I leaned on the tools and strategies that we practice in the Wholistic Woman Community. I sought to understand how my strengths had drifted to the dark side and weren’t bringing the results I wanted. I looked at my energy levels and saw that I had dropped into a lot of caregiver (level 4) energy and started working my way back to level 5, win-win energy. I used my One Word for this year, Joy, as a lens to examine how some activities brought me deep happiness and others did not. Regularly applying all of these strategies helped to get me back on track and restored my optimal balance.
I believe that life is a learning process and that I know how to better recognize my overdoing it…simply because I have over-done it…yet again! With practice, I remember how to find my way back when I get off track, using the tools that have proven helpful over and over again. As I wrote about in my book, Lost and Found…life can be a series of experiences where I lose my way…and find my way again. I’m encouraged to see that I continue to discover, learn, and evolve through the experiences of each year.
The key to finding my way is asking what I need more of, and what I need less of, in order to achieve the balance that is right for me. I ask myself what I need on a daily (and sometimes hourly) basis to make healthy choices. It’s not a perfect system. Some days I can’t get what I need, but with self-awareness I can make sure that I get it in the next day or two in order to maintain a weekly, monthly, and yearly sense of balance.
In the Wholistic Woman community we focus on developing our body, heart, mind, and spirit in the life-long process of integrating all parts to become whole. At the May Evening Retreat, Be Balanced, I will lead women through a short self-assessment to identify how satisfied they are with their well-being in these four areas of heart, mind, body, spirit.
We will discuss strategies and tools to improve our satisfaction in each area. Women will leave with actionable steps to lead a more balanced life. I invite you to join us for this interactive and lively discussion to find your optimal balance. Click here to learn more and register for the Be Balanced Evening Retreat.
Today’s Author: Carol deLaski, PCC, is an executive coach, founder of Wholistic Woman Retreats, and author of Lost and Found: Discovering Strength in Love and Faith. Learn more about her coaching and training services at www.caroldelaski.com or email her at: [email protected].
