Thanksgiving in Balance!

Thanksgiving is a great opportunity to spend time with friends and family and take time to express gratitude for our blessings.  This practice of celebrating for blessings has existed since our creation and was encouraged by our creator.  These festivals would last for days and sometimes even a month.  Celebration in gratefulness is always a great practice to focus on what is good in our lives and minimize those situations that frustrate or discourage.

With that said, one source of stress is the very fact that Thanksgiving and the holidays always seem to be celebrating with LOTS of delicious foods that are tempting for those who are striving to obtain or maintain a healthy lifestyle.  The challenge is the ability to participate and enjoy the foods without feeling like we blown the bank and/or trigger going back into old habits.  Some researchers have estimated that the typical Turkey dinner with all the trimmings can provide 3500 to 5000 calories.  This is not including any other foods or appetizers prior to the meal.

Another concern is that after consuming such a large meal our activities are usually sedentary; sitting on the couch watching football or lying down to take a nap because of the “food comma” that follows.  This could lead to gaining about ½ pound or more.  Now that doesn’t sound like much but when it takes the average person 7 days to lose ½ pound it could lead us to feel stuck in the scenario; “Two steps forward, one step back.”   Another aspect to consider is biochemical analysis has discovered our activity following a meal can impact how that food is used and stored.  For example, when we are sedentary after a meal in excess of our needs we are more likely to store fat, but when we are active after the meal, like taking a walk, our food is used for energy instead.

The question lies, how can we get through Thanksgiving and the Holidays without gaining extra fat and frustration by the very foods we are celebrating with?

Here are a few strategies to consider or maybe try some of your own.

  1. Set up the Meal Buffet Style separate from sitting.  Eating family style with the bowls of food sitting in front of us increase the likeliness of second servings without thinking.  When we have to make the conscious decision to get up for that second helping we may find we don’t really want it and decide against it.
  2. Don’t deprive yourself of your favorite foods.  Studies show that when we do, it usually triggers us to over eat later when our will power is low.  Go ahead and enjoy, just make the portions smaller.
  3. Use smaller plates.  We tend to eat 30% more food if given a larger plates or bowls.  Therefore, set out smaller plates for the meal; try 9 ½ inch plates verses the typical 11 ½.  You may even consider doing this on a regular basis as part of your healthy lifestyle.
  4. Drink plenty of water.   The Thanksgiving meal is usually high in carbohydrates and carbohydrates need water to metabolize.  Therefore, drinking water helps the body be more efficient.  Also, water can help wash out flavors from your mouth that are “calling you” to get more.
  5. Engage in fun activities that require movement using the meal for energy.  Play a game of Wii, or a game of touch football in the yard, or maybe take a walk.  Even just getting up and moving during commercials can help use that food.
  6. Laugh!  Tell stories or play games that are silly such as Pictionary or Charades. As I shared in my blog: Laughter is Incredibly Good Medicine  laughing 100 times is equivalent to 10 minutes on a rowing machine or 15 minutes on the stationary bicycle.
  7. Embrace Balance.  Don’t be discouraged if the Thanksgiving meal leaves you feeling like a sack of potatoes.  One meal does not need to be the trigger to sabotage your wellness goals throughout the holidays. Remember that every meal is an opportunity to balance the ones not in alignment with your goals.  Don’t sweat it or beat yourself up, just balance it, for this is truly the path of living a balanced life of “Wholistic Wellbeing!

Summary: Thanksgiving and the Holidays are a time of celebration and fun.  Choose to embrace strategies that create balance in self-care, health, and overall Wholistic Wellbeing.  Finding steadfast balance is only done after learning to stay standing on shaking ground.   For when we embrace balance to feel our best and live our best life.   Celebrate, Enjoy, Balance, and Thrive!

 

Today’s author: Sandie Lynch MS, RDN, LDN, Registered Dietitian, Personal Trainer, Personal Development Coach and CEO of ATP Consultants, LLC.   Sandie provides private coaching and group fitness classes sharing 5 Principles to Attain Top Performance in living your best life at any age!

Save

Thank You – for Changing my Life

Have you ever noticed that sometimes the words ‘thank you’ just aren’t enough?

At times those two special words fall short of encompassing the depth of the emotions that we feel.  They suffice for simple acts of courtesy and thoughtfulness, but seem insufficient when thanking someone for helping you through a life-altering experience. Those people who help us navigate major crossroads in our lives are special indeed. In my opinion, these game-changers deserve a deeper, more meaningful, expression of gratitude, but such feelings are sometimes hard to convey.

Think about it. Is there someone you’ve always wanted to thank for having pointed you in a new direction or provided guidance or support during a time of great change? It may be a teacher, coach, parent, grandparent, or even a boss, which was the case for me.

There was a manager early in my career who had made a lasting impact on my life, yet I didn’t know how to find her to thank her. Our lives had gone in different directions many years ago and we had lost touch. Then, just recently at a work reunion I found myself standing unknowingly beside her. I heard someone say, “Suzanne”, and I turned to glance at the name badge of the woman next to me and looked fully into the face of the woman I had been carrying a burning desire to thank for the last twenty-some years. A moment of simultaneous recognition occurred as she glanced at my name badge and we exclaimed our mutual surprise. I told her that I had longed for this chance to thank her. I wanted her to know that a decision she made, and a choice she gave me, created an opportunity that took my life in a new and wonderful direction. It impacted both my family and me profoundly, and I told her how incredibly grateful I have been over the passing years. The words thank you seemed inadequate to express the deep appreciation I felt towards Suzanne. Interestingly, she was unaware of the impact she had had on my life, which made this encounter all the more meaningful and sweet. We recalled our bonding experience……..

In 1986, we were working together on M Street in Washington, DC for a telecommunications company that had developed the first public email system. At that time, email was largely unheard of and this new technology drew people who were pioneers; innovative and capable of thinking ‘outside of the box’.  It was an exciting time to work among so many creative individuals.

I was a 27-year-old young professional commuting to DC daily on the Metro from Rockville, where I lived with my husband at the time. The commute itself was memorable because I went into labor one day while en-route to work when I was pregnant with our first child. It was two weeks prior to my due date and I was in the final stages of wrapping up work projects as I prepared for maternity leave. I realized that my labor had begun on the metro and went immediately to Suzanne after walking to the office. I saw the quizzical expression on her face as I hesitantly told her that I desperately needed to leave, even though I had just arrived at work. Her face changed from curiosity to alarm as the dawning realization registered that she had a woman in labor in her office. Unsure of what to do, she quickly called for help from fellow co-workers (relying especially on the wisdom of those who were mothers) and devised a plan to get me to a nearby hospital.

Once at the hospital, everything went smoothly and our son Patrick was born that evening. It’s safe to say that becoming a mother has been one of the most meaningful experiences of my life. I fell deeply in love with my newborn son and basked in the time I had with him at home in those first weeks of his life. We were challenged by colic,yet even that difficulty didn’t affect a growing conviction in me that I wanted more time at home with him. Near the end of my maternity leave, I visited my office with Patrick, who was practically a celebrity there. Babies at work were always a pleasant distraction, but Suzanne and my co-workers were especially enthralled with Patrick, given the part they had played in his arrival into the world.

During that visit, I found the courage to ask Suzanne the burning question on my heart. I told her how meaningful it was to be at home with my baby, and asked if I could extend my maternity leave by working from home for three more months. At that time, telecommuting was unheard of and my request was completely out of the norm. Suzanne gave me that quizzical expression again, but this time she knew what she wanted to do. She said with conviction, “Carol, I believe that in these times companies need to make concessions for women as they raise their families. I’d like to help make that happen for you.” Her confident answer gave me an initial surge of hope, which then deflated somewhat as she went onto explain that she would have to get approval from upper management. She said if it was up to her, she would do it for me in an instant, but it wasn’t her decision to make. I went home encouraged that I had someone within the company advocating for me,and I prepared to wait and see what would be the result of my asking for what I truly wanted. It was a brave new idea and neither Suzanne nor I knew where it would lead.

Coincidentally enough, Suzanne’s boss at the time, Leslie, was now standing beside us at the reunion. Leslie laughed as we recalled the story and remembered that her initial response to the idea of me working from home was an emphatic ‘no!’  She had reasonable doubts at the time; questioning how they would know the quantity and quality of my work. In the face of her resistance, Suzanne and I came up with measureable work assignments, reporting methods, and a commitment on my part to come into the office once a week. Despite Leslie’s overall reluctance, Suzanne persisted in advocating for my cause, even taking the discussion to happy hour at the local hot spot that Leslie and other managers had frequented at the time. With such focused effort, Suzanne eventually won the approval needed to allow me to work from home for another three months.

The endeavor was so successful that after three months my petition to extend my working from home was easily approved.  I continued to work from home for six years while raising both Patrick and our next son, Ben. The independent work experience gave me the confidence to become a telecom contractor for the following nineteen years and set me up for success when I began a second career as an entrepreneurial coach. Working from home, quite simply, changed my life.

The decision Suzanne had made to advocate for me had not only changed my life (and the lives of my children) but it set a precedent that rippled and impacted other lives. My venture into being one of the first telecommuters was so successful that management easily approved telecommuting for other new working mothers in following years.

Our recollections at the reunion were made even sweeter as I shared that Patrick was now 27 years old (interestingly, the same age I was when the original encounter with Suzanne had occurred). Suzanne received this news with genuine happiness and a nod of acknowledgement to the bittersweet passage of time.

Leslie pulled me aside later to thank me for relating the story of how their decisions had impacted my life. She shared that Suzanne hadn’t wanted to come to the reunion, and Leslie had gone to great efforts to get her there. I’m glad she did because my heart is now more peaceful knowing that I have thanked the woman who gave me the opportunity to define my own balance between mothering and working. The door Suzanne opened for me led to a path that brought substantial and overwhelming meaning to my life, and I genuinely thank her from the depths of my heart.

As you consider this story…

Who do you want to thank for giving you an opportunity?

How has your life been changed by someone who supported you?

And what will you do with that information?

I encourage you to look for ways to express your gratitude this month and welcome hearing your stories. Write to me at [email protected].

 

Today’s author: Carol deLaski is a certified leadership coach, author, and speaker. At her monthly Breakthrough Workshops in November she will teach a 7 level tool to communicate more effectively. For more information and registration details on Communication That Makes a Difference click here

Save

Permission Slips

Do you ever feel like you are holding yourself back?  I know I do!  One of the areas I hold myself back in is in my blog writing.  I hold myself back with my perfectionism tendencies.  Every time I sit down to blog, I put pressure on myself to make it be something inspiring, thought provoking, Wholistic Woman worthy….but what is that really?   What would it be like if I gave myself permission for my blog to be less than perfect?

I recently started an eCourse on the book “The Gifts of Imperfection” by Bréne Brown.  My first assignment with the course was a creative journaling exercise around permission.  The question posed was, “What kind of permission do you need to give yourself to do the work required for wholehearted living?”.  The assignment was to design a permission slip which answered this question.  Here is what I came up with:

Image                         Image 1

In this exercise I gave my self permission to:

  • Make mistakes
  • Embarrass myself
  • Start over – moment by moment
  • Be “Self” centered
  • Play by my own rules
  • Teach AND learn
  • Unfold
  • Get rid of what is no longer serving me
  • Not know the answers
  • Be inspired by others
  • Experiment
  • Ask for help
  • Grow where I’m planted
  • Be a work in progress

I’ve been living this week with this permission slip metaphorically in my back pocket.  What I’ve noticed is that I’m more willing to take risks.  I’ve been reaching out to people whom I’ve wanted to have difficult conversations with but was afraid to.  I’ve allowed myself to cry in front of a group where normally I would have tried to hold it all together.  I’ve been a better listener.  I’ve been kinder to myself, and I’ve experienced more peace.  And, my blog was easier to write 🙂

So, my question to you is, what do you need to give yourself permission for?  Don’t filter your answer.  What’s the first thing that pops in you head?  Please leave your answer in the comment section.

Now, I challenge you to put it on paper in some way.  It could be as simple as writing your permissions on a piece of paper, or you may want to get more creative.  Either way, take the time this week to practice allowing that in your life and just notice what changes.  Go have fun with this, you have my permission!

 

Today’s author: Laura Hall is an iPEC certified life coach whose business, Hall Coaching, was established in 2009 with the vision of waking women up from the nightmares of “How did I get here?” and, “Is this as good as it gets?”, so that they can begin creating and living the life of their real dreams, hopes and desires. She offers both one on one as well as group coaching services. She can be reached at [email protected] or check out her website at www.hallcoaching.com

Save

Laughter is Incredibly Good Medicine!

 “What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul.” ~Yiddish Proverb

Do you like to laugh?  How often do you laugh a day?  How much you laugh could have a huge impact on your health.

People who know me will say they can tell when I am present, before they ever see me, when they hear me laugh.  I must confess, I absolutely love to laugh and look for any opportunity to do so.  I think I was born to laugh because throughout my years I can remember people laughing because I was laughing.  My mother said I sounded like Woody Woodpecker (a laughing woodpecker cartoon back in the 60’s) when I was small and in high school I was in the year book for “funniest laugh.”  Some would also say the loudest as well because I have never been able to keep my laughter quiet; except maybe when I was smaller and my Dad would pick on me in church and I knew I would get in trouble with Mom, but anyone looking at me knew what was going on because I would be bouncing off the pew trying to hold it back.  Later in high school, I once was sent out of my history class because I was laughing so uncontrollably the teacher felt I was disrupting the class.  I missed the whole class because I couldn’t stop.  Most of the time, I find I am either laughing at myself or with others who can laugh at life.

The reason I share this, is if you are like me, you will have fewer illnesses and stress in your life when including laughter on a daily basis.  If laughter is not something you do often, I encourage you to find opportunities to do it as often as possible because the benefits are incredible.  During a recent research review for my weekly ATP fitness program for ways to lower stress, I discovered this unbelievable list of positive health benefits. Laughter does the following….

  • Boost immunity by decreasing the stress hormones cortisol and epinephrine
  • Increases levels of natural killer (NK) cell activity (this is a good thing)  NK cells are a type of white blood cell that attacks cancer tumors and cells infected by viruses such as HIV
  • Improves blood pressure by relaxing the blood vessel wall (endothelium) therefore increasing vascular blood flow and oxygenation
  • Improves inhalation due to the deep breathing, this clears the airways and increases oxygen intake
  • Improves blood glucose levels in individuals with type 2 diabetes, researchers are not sure if this is due to increased expenditure or stimulation of the neuroendocrine system preventing glucose spikes
  • Relieves pain by releasing endorphins this relaxes the muscles especially for spastic muscle pain
  • Reduces feelings of fear, anxiety, anger, and aggression making light of a bad situation
  • Makes bonding with others easier by cutting the tension especially with strangers, it is a universal communication among cultures
  • Stimulates organs and aids in digestion, reduces symptoms related to irritable bowel syndrome and diverticulosis
  • Boosts immunity by increasing level of salivary immunoglobulin A (IgA) an antibody that fights bacteria and infections especially in the respiratory system, also increases Lymphocytes B and T cells which also fight infections, viruses, and manage immune responses

Researchers have also discovered that laughing a 100 times is equivalent to 10 minutes on a rowing machine or 15 minutes on the stationary bicycle. Now that is something to laugh about!  So laugh it up ladies and seek social interaction; we are 30% more likely to laugh with others.

Summary: Laughter is Good Medicine!  We were designed perfectly with everything we need to live within this stressful world.  During stressful times remember this list, call a friend, and allow laughter to fill your days!  Let laughter and your body provide you with what you need to get through any situation no matter how difficult.

An inspirational encouragement….

Proverbs 17-22 “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”

Here are some things to ponder….

1. What activities make me laugh?

2. Who are the people that increase my chances of laughing?

3. What can I do to add more laughter to my day?

Would love to hear what makes you laugh or have you share funny pictures or videos with our “Wholistic” community!

 

Today’s author: Sandie Lynch MS, RDN, LDN, Registered Dietitian, Personal Trainer, Personal Development Coach and CEO of ATP Consultants, LLC.   Sandie provides private coaching and group fitness classes sharing 5 Principles to Attain Top Performance in living your best life at any age!

Save

On-the-Grow: Genuine Connections

On-the-Grow: Genuine Connections

As I reflect on the wonderful Heart Centered Leadership retreat hosted by the Wholistic Coaching Coalition last week, I am filled with gratitude. Each time this community comes together there is a buzz of genuine connection that creates an uplifting energy which sustains me long after we part ways. There are hugs, laughter, and sincere interactions of interest and concern. This occurs whether women are meeting for the first time or reconnecting.

What creates the fertile soil for this garden of women-on-the-grow; women who are embracing self-development to improve their professional and personal lives? I believe this environment is grounded in four fundamental coaching principles that seed and nurture the Wholistic Woman Community.

The Community practices non-judgment. In so many areas of our lives women are encouraged to compare themselves to others, whether that “other” is someone in the media, someone in the office, or someone in our families. In this community, however, no one is being compared to anyone else. Acceptance occurs for who you are and where you are in your life, and acknowledgement for being open to lifelong learning.

We also practice respect. We see and appreciate every woman’s unique strengths, and we encourage one another to use these strengths in an ever-more intentional manner. Moreover, we respect the process of growth, and trust that each of us will take away what is most important for ourselves from the new information being offered. We don’t ‘should’ on one another, telling each other what to do or dictating our opinions. We stay focused on our own growth while allowing others to discover their own insights.

Another crucial practice is listening deeply to what is being said as well as to what is left unsaid. Intuitive listening is a skill that the coaches of this community have invested significant energy to master. The more time women spend in this community, the more they develop the skill themselves.  In this busy world it is becoming more and more unusual to have occasions of deep connection with ourselves and with others. We are bombarded with an almost continuous stream of information and opportunities to connect via various technologies. The Wholistic Woman events allow for in-person connections where we are able to make eye contact, focus on what is being said, and let go of distractions to allow for more fulfilling interactions. The result is that we feel uplifted rather than depleted.

Each of these coaching practices of non-judgment, respect, and deep listening contribute to create an overall positive environment for self-discovery. Consciously using these practices we develop trust that leads to the final, important, practice: finding and using our voices. This safe space for sharing allows women to get out of our own heads and risk telling others what our challenges are, and what insights are being learned as we approach our own growing edge. This edge is the place where we are mentally, physically, spiritually, or emotionally stretching, experimenting, and discovering new truths or ways of being. The coaches model continual growth and encourage like-minded women to do the same.

After co-hosting five retreats and other assorted events, I can easily say that these are the qualities that make the Wholistic Woman Community uniquely special. I encourage you to find a way to stay connected to this community so that you will reap the benefits throughout the year. Choose a coach to work with, attend a workshop, or become a member and be involved in this dynamic, stretching, garden of blossoming women.

You will also find these coaching qualities practiced monthly at the Breakthrough Workshops. This month’s topic is “Find Out What’s Holding You Back” and will be offered at two times: an evening workshop for men and women on Tuesday, October 15th from 5:30-7:00 PM, and a morning workshop for women on Wednesday, October 16th from 8:00-9:30 AM. I invite you to join me to learn four effective strategies to break free and begin moving forward to reach your goals. Click here for details or to register.

 

Today’s author: Carol deLaski is a certified leadership coach, author, and speaker. You may contact her at [email protected] or 301-371-7460.

Save

What Do You Expect?

What Do You Expect?

Do you think its possible to live your life without expectations?

For me, the answer is not yet.  I’m not spiritually evolved enough.  I haven’t learned how to fully live in the present.

My observation is that expectations come from past experiences and are related to how we believe or want something to turn out in the future.   They get in the way of being fully present in the now.

As a life coach, I work a lot with people on managing expectations.  Unrealistic expectations set us up for disappointment.  This is true on so many levels.  From little thing like when I was playing golf yesterday and I expected that I could make the 4 foot putt, and I didn’t, to bigger things like how I expect my children to dress and behave now that they are teenagers.   I encourage you to start observing how expectations show up in your life, both at work and at home, and how they may be causing you unnecessary frustration.  How often do you expect something to turn out a certain way, and when it doesn’t you get upset.  As Byron Katie says, “If you argue against reality, you will suffer”.  How would your life change if you started practicing accepting reality instead of arguing against it?

Accepting it is not the same as liking it.  Accepting it is about neutralizing your feelings about it.  I believe this puts us in a better space to choose what our next step is.  We are responsible for our own lives.  We have response-ablility.  We choose how we respond when our expectations and reality don’t line up, and what I know to be true is that when we are coming from a place of frustration, anger, intolerance or any other angst filled emotion, we are reacting and not responding.  I don’t know about you, but I always feel better when I respond versus react.

I am undoubtedly a work in progress when it comes to practicing this.  I catch myself needing to manage my expectations on a daily basis.  Being aware of the impact of my expectations has opened me up to seeing reality more clearly.  And, as reality becomes clear so do my choices of how to respond.

I encourage you to experiment with this yourself. The next time you are frustrated, mad, or just otherwise irritated, take a look at how your expectations and reality are not lining up.  I’d love to hear your thoughts on expectations vs reality and how it is showing up in your life!

 

 

Today’s author: Laura Hall is an iPEC certified life coach whose business, Hall Coaching, was established in 2009 with the vision of waking women up from the nightmares of “How did I get here?” and, “Is this as good as it gets?”, so that they can begin creating and living the life of their real dreams, hopes and desires. She offers both one on one as well as group coaching services. She can be reached at [email protected] or check out her website at www.hallcoaching.com

Save