by Carol deLaski | Apr 23, 2014 | Business, Laura Hall, Professional Development
“Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” ~ Albert Einstein
Everyone is a genius! You are a genius. Don’t believe me!?! Well, why would you? I’m just Laura Hall, but how can you deny the fact when Albert Einstein tells you that everyone is a genius, and guess what? You are included in everyone. So there! You are a genius!
You know who else is a genius?
Your teenager, you know the one I’m talking about – the one who is making questionable decisions right now – is a genius. Your spouse is a genius. Yes, even though they forget to take out the trash, or buy you a gift on your birthday, or leave their socks in the family room despite you constantly reminding them to please take their socks to the laundry room, or…(you get the point). And you know that person you work with, the employee or coworker who you have to constantly remind about protocols and procedures, yes, they too are a genius. How can I say that you ask? Easy! Albert Einstein told me 🙂
Have you ever heard of the book StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath? It’s a book I use often with my life coaching clients. The book is based on the idea that people have several times more potential for growth when they invest evergy in developing their strengths instead of correcting their deficiencies. In other words, that they stop tring to be a tree climbing fish and instead focus on developing their ability to breathe under water. Are you living your life with a focus on developing the things that you are naturally gifted at, or are you trying to swim upstream? Are you encouraging your team, those people around you on a daily basis – your family, your co-workers, your employees – to do the same or are you asking a fish to climb a tree and then wondering why you are all so frustrated? There is another way. Start looking for the genius in yourself as well as in those you associate with. I promise you, it is there. Then begin asking yourself, how can this genius be used to bring more effectiveness, harmony, peace (or whatever else you think your life or business could use more of) to what is going on right now.
Exactly one week from today, on Wednesday April 30th, I will be leading a workshop right here in Frederick for people who are ready to join in the conversation about what’s right with people and to discuss how looking at strengths can impact you business and your life. I hope you will consider joining me. Click here for details.
Today’s author: Laura Hall is an iPEC certified life coach whose business, Hall Coaching, was established in 2009 with the vision of waking women up from the nightmares of “How did I get here?” and, “Is this as good as it gets?”, so that they can begin creating and living the life of their real dreams, hopes and desires. She offers both one on one as well as group coaching services. She can be reached at [email protected] or check out her website at www.hallcoaching.com
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by Carol deLaski | Apr 16, 2014 | Carol deLaski
What helps you to get through the daily challenges of life?
Where do you find the inner strength to manage the hurdles that frequently occur?
The wisdom that people share when I speak on this topic never ceases to inspire me. Together we explore and discover ways to navigate both the large and small adversities that quite naturally come with living.
At the recent ‘Be Strong’ Wholistic Woman Retreat, I was reminded once again of the collective wisdom that can be found in a group of individuals. The Retreat was also the soft launch of the first book I authored; Lost and Found: Discovering Strength in Love and Faith. That day, fifty women enjoyed the beautiful surroundings of rustic yet comfortable ThorpeWood in the Catoctin Mountains. The wooden floor and high beamed ceilings of the lodge were made contiguous by tall windows that allowed the light to stream in as well as affording us a view of the surrounding woodlands. It felt as if the trees encircling the lodge were holding this special place and day, in a supportive embrace as the women there relaxed, talked, laughed, and sometimes cried together.
The questions we pondered were how to find inner strength through love and our beliefs. Great discussions occurred in which we identified what we put our faith in and how we learn to accept and love ourselves better.
In the book I tell my story of searching for love outside of myself for many years as I looked to others to fill the longings in my heart. After a surprisingly insightful trip to Europe in 2010, I learned that the most important relationship of all is with my Self. I don’t mean this in a self-centered or narcissistic way, but rather in a self- caring way. To embrace this concept fully I needed to overcome the false belief that caring for me is selfish. I replaced it with a belief that it’s my responsibility to accept, care for, and love who I am. The more I am able to accept all of myself, both my strengths and imperfections, the more I am able to accept others completely for who they are. This perspective helps me acknowledge that we are all on a lifelong journey towards actualizing our full potential.
What keeps us from accepting and loving who we are? In a world that often tells us to be more and do more it can be difficult to relax and trust that we are enough just the way we are. Understanding how to love and care for ourselves is a journey towards wholeness that is personal and moves at an individual pace.
Love becomes a source of strength when we cultivate habits of self-care. There are many opportunities for us to take care of our bodies, hearts, minds, and spirits….and only you know which ones are right for you. In some ways life is like an experiment and as we try out new self-care habits, we must observe the impact they have on us and decide if we want to make any adjustments based on what we observe.
The most important habit I have found and adopted is to ask myself frequently what do I need?
My ability to answer that question at any given moment is determined by how self-aware I am. Am I tuned into my physical being and aware of my need for nourishment, movement, touch, or rest? Am I aware of my mental state and whether I need to increase or reduce my thought processes?
Am I aware of the needs of my heart for loving connections with others; or of my spirit’s need to connect with something bigger than me….the source of creation and unconditional love?
As a self-aware person I feel all my emotions; both positive and negative. I stop avoiding the uncomfortable or challenging feelings and participate in the dance that I do between doubt and fear and trust and faith.
When you feel uncomfortable in which direction do you turn? Do you allow self- critical thoughts and emotions to run rampant and take you down a fretful path? Or do you choose to rely on your belief in something bigger than yourself; perhaps energy that while unseen is still very real to you and a potential source of love and compassion?
Discovering and developing your inner strength through love and faith is a lifelong journey. As a professional coach and author I offer my own story as a springboard for others to explore their stories. Reflection questions are designed to guide the reader to further develop their own inner strength.
I like to think of our lives as a breathing jigsaw puzzle and the pieces are being formed by our individual experiences and choices. On any given day the elements of humor, loving relationships with others, purposeful self- care and a personal connection with the Higher Being of our understanding, develops the beautiful picture that is our lives. I hope you choose wisely today.
Today’s author: Carol deLaski, PCC, is an author, speaker, and coach. Learn more about Carol and how to get a copy of her new book at www.caroldelaski.com
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by Carol deLaski | Mar 26, 2014 | Confidence, Retreats, Sandie Lynch
Find Strength in Connections
To Self, A Higher Being, and Others in Love and Faith
Love was definitely in the air at our recent “Be Strong” Wholistic Woman Retreat with Mountain Memories at ThorpeWood in Thurmont, Maryland.
Fifty-two women convened in a beautiful mountain lodge for the soft launch of Coach Carol deLaski’s first book, Lost and Found. The day’s events centered on discussions on how to find inner strength through love and faith.
Coach Carol started the day by giving everyone a complimentary copy of her book and explained that her book was not just about her journey to inner strength, but was written to encourage every reader to discover his/her own inner strength through self exploration of love and faith with the help of the coaching questions found at the end of each chapter.
The morning breakout on Discovering Love was facilitated by Coach Carol and Coach Sandie Lynch. The discussions explored how false beliefs can get in the way of finding true love and keep us small in the world. So many of us believe it is selfish or wrong to focus on ourselves for self-care, but the truth is that only through self-care can we become strong enough to care and love those around us fully and completely without resentment. Activities demonstrated how to listen to the inner voices from the heart, mind, body, and spirit which call us to take better care of ourselves, and how to shift negative energy to positive by changing our thoughts, words, body position, and movement. It was explained how the body is designed to give us inner strength when it is properly nourished with self-care, including simple activities like laughter and embracing someone, which releases oxytocin, the “love” hormone, that makes us more resilient to stress. The breakout ended with everyone sharing the love they found through the power of moving to music and releasing the “love hormone” as they reached out and embraced their neighbor.
Lunch expanded on the concept of the importance of self-care with a delicious healthy lunch catered by Canapes and a hilarious skit presented by Coach Kelye Rouse-Brown, affiliate Coach Pat Herber, Wholistic members Linda Brennan and Kim Klemencic in which they became fictitious honorary wholistic women, “Missy” and “Flow.” Coach Sandie facilitated the skit as she and the rest of the retreat participants encouraged Missy and Flow to try various self-care ideas (watch on the Wholistic Woman Retreats Youtube channel)
The afternoon breakout facilitated by Coach Carol and Coach Laura Hall started with a “Faith Walk” as participants were trusting a partner to guide them through an obstacle course. This continued the journey of finding inner strength by questioning faith in a higher power and how it guides us through life. What some call coincidence, is really divine intervention guiding us to where we are destined to be and learn what we need to learn. Each participant was encouraged to question what they believe in and where they find faith, finding their truth for themselves.
The closing message was delivered by Kath Schnorr as she shared the source of her inner strength through devastating life challenges of delivering, raising, and loving a child with Down Syndrome and losing everything she owned in the Colorado fires last year but realizing everything she needed she still had. She now is recognized as a pillar of strength by her community as she leads other women to find their strength through group support called “Women with Roots.” Recognizing we all have roots, the key is where we are planted.
The retreat finished with a joyous social with more great food by Canapes, wine, and lots of hugs, as women finally departed taking with them a greater understanding of how to find inner strength though love and faith thanks to Coach Carol’s inspiring book and the contributions of the other Wholistic coaches.
In summary, it was a fabulous day and the glow continues as I reflect on the day’s events and connections. The day taught us our inner strength grows and glows as we discover and connect with “roots” to our source of love and faith; and experience this love, peace and joy as it flows to self, our higher power, and finally to others in our lives.
Look inside and discover where the inner voice is calling you and experience the love, joy and peace available as you grow your inner strength.
Get connected with the Wholistic Woman Retreats community and coaches and discover what is waiting for you.
Upcoming events are ATP Fitness where Coach Sandie teaches how to shift energy for motivation and results starting March 31st, Breakfast Workshops with Coach Carol, and many other events to help you discover your best self.
Today’s author: Coach Sandie Lynch, MS, RDN, LDN. Registered Dietitian, Personal Trainer, and Well-being Coach. Owner and CEO of ATP Consultants, LLC where she teaches 5 Key Principles to Attain Top Performance in life at any age.
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by Carol deLaski | Mar 12, 2014 | Laura Hall, Personal Development
If you are a regular follower of Wholistic Woman Retreats, then you know we are all agog over here about our upcoming retreat based on Carol deLaski’s new book, “Lost and Found”. As I’ve been doing my part in preparing for this event, the question that keeps popping up in my head is, “What do I still hope to find in my life?”.
The answer is that I hope to find ME.
I believe that finding myself is one of my purposes in life. Maybe my only purpose (I’m not sure about this yet). But here is the tricky part….I also believe that I’m meant to evolve. So how do I find something that is constantly changing? Hmm…maybe finding myself is about living in the question of, “Who am I?”. Who am I today, right now. What layers of my former ME am I ready to shed so that I can discover the ME of right now. What thoughts are no longer serving the ME of today? What is no longer true for ME?
So I guess that what I am coming to is that finding myself is going to be an ongoing process. It’s going to be a journey, not a destination. Finding ME is going to be something that I work on on a daily basis. It will forever be the answer to the question, what do I still hope to find? And you know what? I am OK with that! I accept that I am a work in progress. Always.
Now it’s your turn! How would you answer the question, “What do you still hope to find?” We’d love to hear your thoughts on this.
Today’s author: Laura Hall is an iPEC certified life coach whose business, Hall Coaching, was established in 2009 with the vision of waking women up from the nightmares of “How did I get here?” and, “Is this as good as it gets?”, so that they can begin creating and living the life of their real dreams, hopes and desires. She offers both one on one as well as group coaching services. She can be reached at [email protected] or check out her website at www.hallcoaching.com
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by Carol deLaski | Feb 26, 2014 | Carol deLaski
Have you ever lost something? Perhaps, like me, you’ve experienced misplacing your keys or cell phone and felt the mild panic that arises as you mentally and physically retrace your steps to try and find them. It is also possible to lose less tangible things like your cool, your confidence, your perspective, or even your purpose or your hope, Sometimes you may not even realize that you’ve lost something important. The awareness can dawn slowly,or at other times in a pivotal moment of insight.
We humans can become physically lost as well. For those of us who are geographically challenged, we can become disoriented, confused, and unsure of how to get where we want to go. Not only can this happen with physical orientation, but we can also get off-track in our careers or our life plan. Questions such as, “How did I get here?” and “Is this all there is?” can arise when we pause to observe where we’ve ended up in our lives.
Collectively, many of us know what it’s like to lose what’s important to us…as well as what it’s like to be lost ourselves. We know what that anxiety (perhaps downright panic) feels like when we realize something important is missing. As a professional coach, I have had the opportunity to witness the discomfort of those who are searching for something, as well as the relief and joy they experience when they get back on track and begin to find what they need. In my work with many clients I have found five steps that move searchers through a Lost and Found Process of self-discovery.
- Realize something is missing – As mentioned previously, whether awareness dawns slowly or in an intense moment of insight, this initial step is when we realize that there is a gap or a hole that needs to be filled. Recognizing and admitting this need sets us up for the second step.
- Be willing to search – Just as we must look for our keys to get where we want to go, so we must also search for the less tangible things that are missing. Our level of discomfort in step one will determine if we search half-heartedly or jump in with both feet to find what is missing.
- Be open to guidance – While it’s crucial to take responsibility for your own search, it’s also important to remember that you can learn from other peoples’ experiences. Being open and letting others know what we are looking for can be a humbling occurrence which may stir up feelings of vulnerability. Yet when we do so, we create opportunities to integrate the wisdom of others in our search and to develop a supportive team.
- Wait for it– For those of us who are doers and enjoy being active,this step may be the most difficult. There are times, however, when we have done all that we can to find what we need and we simply have to wait for it to appear. Be patient and trust that it will come at just the right time. And when what we are seeking emerges, be sure that you don’t overlook the last step.
- Celebrate – When we have found what we are looking for, in this key step we take time to honor our discovery in some fashion. Instinctively, many of us just keep going…..searching for the next thing. But it is important to pause and acknowledge that we now have what we need, that a gap has been filled in our lives, and to let others know about it. We now join the ranks of those who are guides for others who may be searching for the same thing. Rejoice and receive it fully. Then share your unique understanding to offer your inspiration and hope to those who are seeking it.
This is a process for self-discovery…one that will take us from a place of need to a place of fullness. In my book, Lost and Found: Discovering Strength in Love and Faith, I share my story of searching and finding what I needed, while encouraging readers to do the same. To that end, each chapter includes reflection questions for contemplation, journaling, or discussion; providing readers the opportunity to develop their own story as they read mine.
As I celebrate the completion of my book I am practicing step five in two significant ways.
The first is a soft launch of the book at the Wholistic Woman Spring Retreat in Thurmont, MD on March 22nd from 8:00AM– 5:00PM. In this beautiful mountain lodge setting, women will explore their own lost and found stories and share what strengthens them in the face of adversity. Sharing what we have found creates a well of wisdom from which we can all draw strength. Breakout sessions will focus on developing your own definition of self-care and faith. Attendees will clarify what they put their faith in and how to move gracefully in the all too common dance between fear/doubt and trust/faith. This reflective and restorative retreat prepares women to return to their lives ready for give more fully to their families, careers, or whatever they feel passionate about. For more details or to register for this first and very special retreat based on Lost and Found, click here.
The second celebration will be the official launch of Lost and Found: Discovering Strength in Love and Faith on April 4th in Frederick, Md., from 6:00–8:30 PM at Unique Optique, 9 W. Patrick Street. You are warmly invited to attend this book signing event to celebrate with me. For details, click here.
Today’s author: Carol deLaski is an author, speaker, and professional coach who engages individuals and businesses in positive growth. Write to her at [email protected]
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by Carol deLaski | Feb 17, 2014 | Business, Carol deLaski, Professional Development
Are you engaged or disengaged with your work?
If you admit to feeling disengaged, you’re not alone. Studies show that a whopping 71% of the US workforce is not engaged in their work. While it’s good to know that we’re not alone, it makes me wonder how the 29% who feel engaged are accomplishing this. How do they do it?
What would it be like to wake up energized and enthusiastic about going to work every day?
What would it be like to be the CEO – chief engagement officer – of your work and your life? How can we change our energy about the work we do each day?
Here are 5 ways to increase your level of engagement:
Communicate– Unplug and have real face time conversations as much as possible. Create a genuine connection by talking about more than just work. Showing interest in someone as an individual goes a long way towards creating a lasting impression. You will become a communication model and inspire others as you cultivate real connections.
Listen and learn – to your staff, co-workers, and customers. They all have something valuable to say, and when you listen attentively you will learn what is most important to them. The simple act of listening sends a message to them that you are interested in who they are and what they have to say.
Care – Give your full attention to the people you interact with every day. Being thoughtful goes a long way towards creating positive energy. It often sparks mutual caring among teammates and colleagues and builds constructive relationships.
Atmosphere – Create a positive atmosphere. Choose to smile and make eye contact. Energy is contagious. When you opt to be positive it will ripple out to others in your circle of influence.
Praise – Catch people doing things right and tell them how great they are. People strive to do better when their efforts are noticed and appreciated.
Whether you manage a team or work independently, your level of engagement affects not only how you feel but also the bottom line. You will eliminate the cost of lost productivity, absenteeism, and disgruntled behavior by connecting with those around you.
There are two approaches that affirm and increase positive connections for individuals and teams.
1- Focus on what’s right by identifying your own and your co-workers strengths. In a world where we tend to focus on what’s wrong and what needs fixing, it can be refreshingly positive to instead focus on what is working. How do each person’s strengths benefit the team’s efforts and lead to greater success? What would happen if you developed those strengths further and empowered each person to do their best, and to be their best? What would be the impact on the bottom line if each employee was empowered to use their strengths fully?
2- Focus on a theme. Use the One Word approach to expand your awareness and center your attention over an entire year on an attribute that promotes your growth and success. Teams and organizations that are using this approach organize individuals collectively behind a common purpose and hold a vision before them for mutual success.
These two approaches for greater Focus develop the character of those who use them. That character development impacts the actions that they take. Those actions have an influence on their level of engagement and the success of the company…..as well asother activities they give their attention to.
What is one step you’re willing to take today to be more engaging?
Today’s author: Carol deLaski is a certified leadership coach and speaker. She will be leading a Breakthrough Workshop for Women: Stay Focused, Stay Motivated with One Word on February 19th from 9-10:30 am. Click here for more details and to pre-register
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