by Carol deLaski | Jun 5, 2013 | Carol deLaski, Confidence, Personal Development, Professional Development, Success
These Boots Are Made for Walking….and that’s just what they’ll do…one of these days these boots are going to walk all over blue.
While strolling through life in my cowgirl boots this past month, many people have considerately asked me about my head and how my recovery from the concussion is going (which I had written about in the recent blog of Trading Ski Boots for Cowgirl Boots). I have been touched by everyone’s concern and wish I could say that I’m fully recovered, just as a toddler will say “all better”, and run back into play after receiving a hug and a kiss. I wish I could do the same. “Not yet, but I’m working on it”, has been my answer.
There are many who struggle with significantly worse injuries and illnesses than mine and my heart goes out to them. It helps me, however, to gain perspective when I see the how others are handling their struggles. It also encourages me to look for the lessons in this experience of healing from a head injury. I notice how my thinking flows up and down, which causes my emotions and energy to do the same.
I have level one thoughts of fear and anxiety. What if I don’t fully recover? What if I never feel completely better? These thoughts swirl on the outskirts of my consciousness like birds circling above my head. I don’t let them land for long; shooing them away because their presence makes me sink into a blue despair.
Instead I move to level two and struggle with thoughts of frustration and impatience; I can’t believe I’m still not 100%. When am I ever going to be over this?! I experience inner conflict when my head and heart want to pursue normal activities and my body is not cooperating. Headaches and fatigue demand that I stop what I want to do, and instead do what I must do to manage my recovery.
Wanting relief from the struggle I seek level three by asking myself what I can do to take responsibility in this situation. Each day I find that I must balance my commitments to others with my commitment to my own self care. Taking more frequent breaks, even for a short time, makes a difference to my overall well being throughout the day. I walk away from the computer so I can rest my eyes by either closing them or by gazing out the window to take in the beauty I see outdoors. Recognizing that my head is heavy, I find a comfortable position to rest it and take the pressure of its 5-6 pounds off of my neck for awhile. These small gifts that I give to myself throughout the day may seem simple, yet they are exactly what I need to do in order to continue caring for my healing head. I feel empowered in a situation that is beyond my control when I take steps to be responsible for my own care. As long as I remember to take compassionate care of myself, I effectively leave my despair and frustration behind.
Heart healings are featured in my upcoming book, Lost and Found…One woman’s story of finding and keeping faith. I find it interesting that I now have the opportunity to learn about head healing. What I have discovered is that healing takes time. It can be slow and requires a great deal of patience. The pace is easier to endure, however, when I look at it as an opportunity to grow, and these thoughts then shift me to a level five energy. With curiosity I ask myself, what can I learn from this today? I often forget to ask this powerful question. When I don’t, I’m much more likely to remain in level two struggling energy, or grab a hold of a level one thought of fear that swirls above me. But when I apply conscious effort to focus on the opportunities that lie within my difficulties, I raise my spirit, enthusiasm, and overall energy. And that lift, in itself, is worth the effort.
My cowgirl boots which I bought during a level 5 retail therapy outing when I could no longer wear my skiing boots after my concussion are a good reminder to walk all over the level one energy of feeling blue.
Today’s author: Carol deLaski Hayes is a Certified Leadership Coach. You can reach Carol at www.ReadyForInsight.com or at 301-371-7460.
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by Carol deLaski | Apr 22, 2013 | Confidence, Fitness, Health, Nutrition, Sandie Lynch
Enjoy these tips from Coach Sandie’s BYOB: Get the “Skinny” on a Sassy, Sexy Summer.
Sassy is defined as pert, boldly smart, and/or saucy. Looking deeper, one of the definitions for Pert is Lively; sprightly (full of energy): and in good health.
Isn’t being healthy, full of energy and lively what we all want? When we feel like this, confidence exudes from us and confidence is what the polls say is considered sexy! So when we are feeling “Sassy” we can’t help but be “Sexy!”
I know it is not everyone intention or desire to strive to be what our culture considers “sexy” but what would you say to being able to “turn heads” from both men and women? It is not about attracting a mate but radiating an energy people can’t help but notice!
When we are healthy, full of energy, lively and confident, people want to meet and get to know us better. They want to know our secret! So, what are some strategies to create this type of captivating energy?
The first step is belief. Believing that this is possible and then visualize and dress the part of already being there…feel it, and breathe your confidence; being full of energy, health and liveliness!
Second, create and say out loud daily what you want to create using an “I AM” statement such as, “I AM confident” or I AM strong!” Make it your own and assume the feeling of living life exuding this declaration!
And third, think of the things that will manifest health, fun, and joy in your life and then sow these habits into your life consistently! Replace the things that rob energy and the health you wish to create. Make sure the activities and habits you select create fun, and grow your energy. Our heart, mind, body and spirit want to keep doing things that feel good and bring happiness in life and will avoid things that bring pain. So by doing fun things that create health in your life will make it easy to live a lifestyle that will manifest the vision you want.
Therefore, find your joy and live it every day and you will have a “Sassy, Sexy Summer every year!
For more tips and strategies on creating a healthy body and spirit of joy, please feel free to contact me for more events and programs to start your ATP journey today! 240-439-9927.
ATP Consultants, LLC (Attain Top Performance)
Sandie Lynch, MS, RDN, LDN, CPT
Registered Dietitian/Nutritionist and Certified Personal Fitness Trainer.
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by Carol deLaski | Apr 10, 2012 | Carol deLaski, Confidence, Fear
I leave next Monday for two weeks in Israel. I have been planning this trip for almost a year and it seems somewhat surreal that it is finally here. I practice being both an observer and a participant in my life so amidst the busyness of finishing work and packing for the trip, I notice how I am feeling. It is a mixture of anticipation, hope, excitement, and to be honest, a bit of fear.
I ask myself what I am afraid of and find the answer lies in the unknown. I realize that when I travel I choose to open myself to new experiences and intentionally invite the unknown into my life. I prepare as best I can, studying maps, talking to those who have been there, and reading about my destination, but I can only absorb so much. I can’t fully prepare for the experience because there is always an element that is new and unexpected, and that is both unnerving and part of the thrill of traveling.
Most of my fear is actually awe. I know that when I seek God, I find Him. That is proven to me on a daily basis as I look for ‘God moments’; those experiences of grace and connection which assure me of a Divine presence guiding my life. Traveling to the Holy Land, and visiting ancient religious sites, I anticipate that I will know and experience God even more fully. After all, this is my ‘Big Seek’, something I have waited a lifetime to do. I anticipate that awe and wonder will be my traveling companions on this pilgrimage trip. I look forward to knowing God better, growing my knowledge and personal faith.
A more troubling aspect of my fear has to do with the unknown and the uncontrollable. As I get caught up in “what if” thinking I realize that I am fretting over things which I have no control over. Worries ranging from logistical ‘what if my luggage gets lost’ to political ‘what if the trouble in Syria affects us’ leave me anxious and off balance.
I have decided that fear is unavoidable; there is so much we cannot control. In the book, ‘What Women Fear – Walking in Faith that Transforms’, author Angie Smith describes living with fear as a balancing act. Letting go of the expectation of finding a solution to end fear, as well as the hope that we will never tremble again, we embrace the ebb and flow of that balancing act. She asks us to consider what we depend on when our balance begins to tip. Are there patterns in our thinking that throw us off balance and what is the kind of thinking that steadies us? Moving towards greater balance requires concentration, effort, and awareness on our part.
Becoming more aware of our fears can be fearful itself. Like me, if you think, “I’m afraid to know my fears better” be reassured that you are not alone. You can have companions on your journey to learning what restores balance when fear sends you tipping sideways. Together we will emerge as women who not only acknowledge fear but face it with inner resolve and resources. Balancing what we can do with trusting a Divine presence in the midst of fear steadies us and reduces those fears to a more manageable size.
I warmly invite you to explore this topic further with me in two ways.
My next Clarity Coaching Group will be reading and applying principles from Smith’s book “What Women Fear – Walking in Faith that Transforms” starting Thursday, April 12th from 7-8:30 pm. Join us for this 3 month series (meeting bi-monthly) to learn skills to balance your fears by leaning on an inner Divine connection. Click here for more details on this workshop or email [email protected].
And/or stay connected to me on my journey through Israel via my notes on Facebook to see what joys and insights this adventure will bring. Click Here To Follow My Journey.
Today’s author: Carol Hayes, [email protected] or 301-371-7460. Through her company, Clear Choices Coaching, Carol shares her expertise and skill fostering growth in people of all ages. She is especially energized when her coaching helps people experience “breakthrough” moments where they push through their personal edge and grow more fully into the people they want to be. Carol’s certification as a Life and Energy Leadership coach comes from The Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (IPEC), which is accredited by the International Coaching Federation. She is also a dynamic speaker and workshop leader who facilitates energizing connections with groups of all sizes.
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by Carol deLaski | Feb 15, 2012 | Carol deLaski, Confidence
“Like attracts like” according to the Law of Attraction; in essence, we create our own reality. By intentionally focusing our thoughts, emotions, and actions on what we want in our lives we will draw it to us. If we are not intentional, however, we can unconsciously attract circumstances and repeat patterns that are not beneficial to us. To use this “law” effectively we need to be aware of what we’re “putting out there”.
Are you attracting what you want into your life? What is comfortable and familiar is not always what we truly want and need. Change, by its very nature, is often uncomfortable and unfamiliar. It’s only through recognizing the discomfort, and consistently sticking with the new behavior or thought pattern, that we create lasting change.
Altering our behaviors only touches the surface. If we want to address the roots of our behavior patterns we need to understand our underlying thoughts. Your self-perception, and your concept of the world around you, is based on your energetic level. This level determines what you attract and what is reflected back to you. Most importantly it determines how effective you are as a leader of your life.
Attitudes (aka energy) are contagious. Most of us have had experiences where we’ve been affected by other people’s energy; either positively or negatively. Sayings such as “one bad apple can spoil the whole lot” speak to the affect one disgruntled and unhappy person can have on an entire group. Likewise, one person exuding enthusiasm and concern can have a positive impact on those with whom she comes into contact. The outer ripple effects of our energy are relatively easy to see. We know when we are being lifted, or drained, by circumstances and people in our lives.
A more challenging area of energy to assess is our internal terrain. How aware are you of the ‘mental chatter’ or tapes that play in your mind on any given day? It’s common knowledge that our thoughts have a powerful impact on what we feel, which then in turn, affects what we do. Our actions are a direct result of the thoughts and feelings we’re experiencing. A simple example, is when we think “I can’t”, we feel powerless and apathetic, which results in lethargy; or no action. By contrast, if we think thoughts of responsibility such as “What’s my part?” we forgive others their part, leading to cooperation and forward movement.
Knowing this, we can then look to our thinking when we are feeling stuck or unable to create the change we want in our lives.
The 7 levels of energy presented on the Energetic Self Perception Chart of Energy Leadership provide a framework in which we can evaluate and understand the impact our thoughts are having on our emotions and actions. With awareness we can then choose to expand the thoughts that are producing the energy we desire. By recognizing and accepting our catabolic, or negative thoughts, we release them and move onto the anabolic, positive thoughts that produce higher levels of energy.
How conscious, or self aware, are you? Your level of consciousness is determined by how you see yourself, the world around you, the people in your life, and life in general. Your consciousness produces energy which will attract the people, events, and outcomes into your personal and professional life. The higher your level of consciousness, the more energy you will have, and the more productive, peaceful and healthy you will be.
To learn more about the 7 Levels of Energy and how to apply the Energy Leadership process join Carol Hayes for a 6 week tele-course starting Wednesday February 15th from 7-8:15 pm. Click here for more details.
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