When you hear the word “friend”, what comes to mind for you?
What qualities does a good friend embody? Before you read any more, take a minute to pause and really think about what it means to be a good friend.
For me, the qualities I look for in a friend include (but are not limited to) the following…
I can trust them
they are honest with me and allow me to be honest with them
they know how to listen well
they have a good sense of humor
they challenge me to be better
they are there to lean on and are supportive in challenging times
they give me the benefit of the doubt
they are encouraging and want the best for me
Now, I want you to think about what kind of friend you are to yourself…
For most of us, we tend to be better friends to others than we are to ourselves. We expect things of ourselves that we would never expect of others, we make promises to ourselves and then don’t keep them (New Year resolutions are the perfect example of this), and we speak to ourselves in ways we would never speak to a friend.
I recently participated in an online workshop on self-compassion and the thing that stood out to me the most was how common it is for us to beat ourselves up with negative self-talk. For most of us, the voice in our head, at times, speaks to us in ways that we would never stand for if it were someone outside ourselves speaking to us that way. We can be really hard on ourselves.
As a recovering perfectionist and someone who is prone to anxiety, I am always on the lookout for ways to manage stress, so when I learned that the research shows that practicing self-compassion not only motivates people to overcome failure and to do better, but also helps reduce stress and anxiety, I knew that becoming a better friend to myself was something I needed to lean into. I’ve been practicing self-compassion for about 4 years now and here is what I am learning…
The first step is to set a self-compassion intention. My intention was to practice talking to myself like I would talk to someone I genuinely loved, admired, and believed was doing the best they could do in any given moment.
The second step is awareness. Pay attention to your self-talk, especially when you feel you’ve messed up in some way. Are you a critic or a cheerleader? Work on being mindful of the language that you default to during the stressful times in your life.
The third step is to practice compassion. Think of someone outside yourself that you love dearly…practice talking to yourself the way you would talk to them.
I am passionate about the topic of compassion because I think our modern lives would be exponentially better if we all practiced being more compassionate both to ourselves and others. Life is hard at times! believe in being the change I want to see in the world. I would love to see more compassion, so it is my goal to be more compassionate. We are all human, and part of the human experience is the fact that we are all imperfect. Let’s practice being kind to ourselves and kind to others. Just imagine the impact a more compassionate world would have… it’s mind blowing!!!
Who wants to join me?
If you know me, then you know that my life coaching workshops are all about teaching what I am practicing, so I have two events I’d like to invite you to…
Join us for the day or for the weekend. Either way I know you will walk away feeling rejuvenated, refreshed, and inspired.
The 2nd event, ‘’Be Compassionate’, is on April 25th in Frederick, Maryland. During this interactive workshop, you will have the opportunity to experience a guided meditation on self-compassion, participate in a coach-led discussion on compassion, and you will walk away with strategies to put compassion to work in your life. For details on this event visit https://home/wholisu6/dev.wholisticwomanretreats.com.wholisticwomanretreats.com/events/compassionate-evening-retreat/
I hope to see you at one of these events!
Today’s author: Laura Hall, CPC, CDWF: As a certified professional coach since 2009, Laura Hall, Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator has been helping people just like you make changes in. As a mother of 2 girls, Laura has a special interest in coaching parents, so if you still have children living at home, ask Laura about her Wholehearted Parenting programs. Laura can be reached via email at [email protected] or feel free to visit her website HallCoaching.com
What is One Word, and how do you find yours? Coaches Carol, Laura, and Kelye explore the powerful One Word tool in this audio blog. Play in your browser with the media player below or click “WWR Coaches Discuss One Word”.
“Meditation is like giving a hug to ourselves, getting in touch with that awesome reality in us. While meditating we feel a deep sense of intimacy with God, a love that is inexplicable.” ~Paramahansa Yogananda
Last week during our annual Gratitude Dinner, I led a guided meditation on gratitude. As I was thinking about what I wanted to write about, the idea came to me that instead of my normal written word style blog, it might be fun to record a meditation that you could save and use as part of a gratitude practice.
Yes, November is the month when we all seem to focus on thankfulness, but practicing gratitude works best when it is something you do regularly throughout the year. If you know me, you know that I am a very positive person, but there are times when I am “off” and the thing that helps me get back on track better than anything else is practicing gratitude.
So, if you could use a little more positivity in your life – and who couldn’t – then I invite you to sit back and enjoy this guided meditation. It will take you 12 minutes to complete and ideally you want to find a spot where you will be comfortable and undisturbed.
Today’s author: Laura Hall, CPC, CDWF: As a certified professional coach since 2009, Laura Hall, Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator has been helping people just like you make changes in. As a mother of 2 girls, Laura has a special interest in coaching parents, so if you still have children living at home, ask Laura about her Wholehearted Parenting programs. Laura can be reached via email at [email protected] or feel free to visit her website HallCoaching.com
noun: life coach – a person who counsels and encourages clients on matters having to do with careers or personal challenges.
Wholistic Woman Retreats is a community of women dedicated to being their best through personal and professional development activities and programs. One of the ways we do this is through our ‘Be You’ Evening Retreat series where certified professional life and business coaches facilitate programs aimed at teaching tools and strategies that will help you more consistently be your best, no matter where you are or what you are doing.
Our programs are unique because we use a coach-approach. A good life or business coach knows how to ask the right questions to help you uncover what is best for you!
It is very common for participants to leave the Be You Evening Retreats feeling energized, excited to begin practicing new tools, and hungry for more! Our last ‘Be You’ event for this year will be on Wednesday October 25 and is titled BeCoached.
Be Coached will be a little different than the other retreats this year. Instead of being facilitated by just one coach, there will be five coaches on hand. Each one will lead a coaching discussion on the topic that they presented earlier this year.
All are welcome! Whether you attended the programs earlier this year or not, this night is designed just for you!
If you missed a ‘Be You’ retreat…this will be your chance to catch up and hear highlights of the topic.
Or
If you attended the original workshop and now you’re ready for more…this will be your chance to check-in and go deeper. You’ll have the opportunity to share where you are being successful putting the tools into practice as well as where you could use further development.
So, whether you’re catching up, or continuing to learn, this event will be a great capstone on the year of Being More You!
At Be Coached, you will have the opportunity to visit 2 different discussions, so start thinking about the two that are right for you. Tables will fill on a first come, first served basis, so register for the retreat now and plan to arrive early to get your first choice and continue your personal development journey with us.
Be Balanced – Coach Carol will lead a discussion to better understand Wholistic Balance of heart, mind, body, and spirit. She will introduce and review tools to help you achieve the balance that is just right for you.
Be Positive – Coach Kelye will help you understand the science of positive psychology and share tips to become more aware, and intentional, about increasing your happiness levels.
Be Clear – Coach Laura will discuss boundaries, focusing on the challenges and as well as the benefits of setting clear boundaries with friends, families, and at work.
Be Energized – Coaches will discuss the benefits of regularly using affirmations; noticing that what we say to ourselves affects our energy and our ability to move forward.
Be Financially Fearless – Coach Jane will help you identify your inner mindset around money and show you how authenticity, gratitude, and calm can radically change your relationship with your finances.
This event is your opportunity to experience what it is like to be coached in small groups. Please consider this your invitation to join our coaches and our dynamic community of women-on-the-grow!
Come on your own or bring a friend. We promise you will feel welcomed and accepted.
Today’s author: Laura Hall, CPC, CDWF: As a certified professional coach since 2009, Laura Hall, Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator has been helping people just like you make changes in. As a mother of 2 girls, Laura has a special interest in coaching parents, so if you still have children living at home, ask Laura about her Wholehearted Parenting programs. Laura can be reached via email at [email protected] or feel free to visit her website HallCoaching.com
“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing” ~ George Bernard Shaw
I turned 50 this year and as a gift to myself, my family, and my friends, I took the time to put together a list of 50 things I’ve learned over 50 years. You can click here if you’d like to read the entire list 🙂
#18 on the list was “Don’t forget how to play and have fun!”.
I am naturally a playful person. I love being silly and make it a point to not take myself too seriously. My nickname is “Fun-sized” and while this might have to do with my physical stature – I stand 5’ 1/2” on a good day – I also think it comes from the fact that I make a point to build fun and play into my life on a regular basis. As kids, we all knew how to play…it just came naturally, but somewhere along the line, many of us either forget how to play or we stop making is a priority. Why is that? Is it because we are self-conscious and worried about how we will look if we allow ourselves to be silly? Is it because we are so focused on achievement that we are afraid if we stop to play we will fall behind our peers? Is it because someone told us we needed to grow up and we took this to mean we needed to stop playing? Is it some other reason? (I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!)
Play has been on my mind a lot recently as we just held our Wholistic Scavenger Hunt evening retreat in and around Baker Park in Frederick, Maryland. As part of the planning committee, it was our intention to create an event that was fun and playful while at the same time challenged participants to step outside their comfort zone. Feedback is that we were able to create just such an event. It warmed my heart and soul to see so many women taking time out of their busy schedules to just play! If you were one of the participants, what was the event like for you? Were you able to play and have fun?
As a student and teacher of The Daring Way curriculum – an experiential methodology based on the research of Dr. Brené Brown – I know that play is essential to wholehearted living. I make fun and play a priority. Here are some of the current things on my “playlist”…
escape rooms (if you don’t know what this is, Google it. I’m sure you have one near you!)
riding my bike
puzzles
going on a motorcycle ride with my hubby
bootcamp-style exercise with good music and fun friends
scrapbooking
playing/drawing with window markers
cards/board games
going out with friends
playing with my dog
singing in the car at the top of my lungs
Now it’s your turn! What’s on your “playlist”? My hope is that by reading this blog you will be inspired to find a least one small way to play today. Go have some fun!
Today’s author: Laura Hall, CPC, CDWF: As a certified professional coach since 2009, Laura Hall, Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator has been helping people just like you make changes in. As a mother of 2 girls, Laura has a special interest in coaching parents, so if you still have children living at home, ask Laura about her Wholehearted Parenting programs. Laura can be reached via email at [email protected] or feel free to visit her website HallCoaching.com
Our next big retreat is coming up on July 26: the Wholistic Woman Scavenger Hunt! We will explore areas in downtown Frederick with friends and teams, and afterward meet at Brewer’s Alley for dinner!
See what the Wholistic Woman coaches have to say about the event, and we’ll see you there!
